Ever feel like the room better yet the world is closing in on you. I have and do often. We are always going /doing. It’s like we’re trying to get to the end of this race as fast as possible. As soon as I do this I’ll be ok. As soon as I get that I’ll be set. And eventually we do too much. Balance is key but my balance is different than yours my calm is different than your calm. And truth is we’re all held together by superglue and duck tape. I don’t want you to think I’m being a downer. I just want to convey that we all have struggle doesn’t matter if you’re rich or poor. What we do with the struggle is where we differ. Do we have something bad happen to us and then in kind do that to someone else or do we overcompensate the other way and let people walk all over us. Use us. Or do we write everyone off and never leave home. There are so many ways to handle it. My advice is do the best you can with what you got. Don’t worry what your neighbor does. I got a lot on the mind at the moment and I dont even have the time to write it down. This blog is my therapy and I can feel the walls getting closer. Now my lifes back on track and I’m just trying to make it. My new shift at work is good but the threat of being drafted and actually being drafted sucks. I could use the money and yet I need the time so I can train to be a fire man. I’m in the middle of other things happening that I won’t share yet. And I still need to find time for myself and my lady. My lady makes the struggle worth it though. What I do I do for her and myself and no matter what I get to see her at the end of the day even if only for a short time it gives me the gumption to push through. My problem is I want to put 100 percent in everything I do. I just dont have the time or mental capacity to do that so do I do less or do I do it all till I break. I dont want to break. I need a vacation but as soon as I get back from vacation I need another vacation. On top of all that I’m going to be going to EMT school working doing the fire academy thing all stuff I want to do it just makes my head hurt to think of it. Because I also wouldn’t mind just quitting everything buying a shit box somewhere cheap and beautiful and enjoying what’s left of this life. Nothing is promised. Look at what you have not necessarily what you want.I’m going to give myself some advice. Do the best you can with what you got. Because you have a lot. And if nothing else you got the girl.
As always I love you no matter what. Adapt or die. This is me saying do what makes you happy.
A night on the town.